JokzBlog.com

Why did the robber take a bath?
So he could
make a clean getaway.

written by Jokester

What do you call the ring that worms leave round

the bath ?
The scum of the earth !

written by Jokester

What dog loves to take bubble baths ?
A
shampoodle !

written by Jokester

What animal do you look like when you get into
the
bath ?
A little bear !

written by Jokester

Which birds steal soap from the bath ?
Robber
ducks !

written by Jokester

How do you know that there’s a monster in your
bath?
You can’t get the shower curtain closed.

written by Jokester

What happened to the tiger who took a bath three

times a day ?
After a week he was spotless !

written by Jokester

Robot: I have to dry my feet carefully after a

bath.
Monster: Why? Robot: Otherwise I get rusty nails.

written by Jokester

Dr Frankenstein:
I’ve just invented
something that everyone in the world will want! You
know how you get a
nasty ring around the bathtub every time you use it,
and you have to
clean the ring off?
Igor: Yes, I hate it.
Dr Frankenstein: Well,
you need never have a bathtub ring again! I’ve
invented the square
tub . . .

written by Jokester

Did you hear about the idiot who had a
new
bath put in?
The plumber said, “Would you like a plug for it?”

The idiot replied, “Oh, I didn’t know it was electric.”

written by Jokester

Hotel
guest: Can you give me a room and a
bath, please?
Porter: I can give you a room, but you’ll have to wash

yourself.

written by Jokester

Mom: Joe, time for your medicine.
Joe: I’ll
run the bath then.
Mom: Why?
Joe: Because on the bottle it says
“to be taken in water.”

written by Jokester

Does your brother keep himself clean?
Oh,
yes. He takes a bath every month whether he needs one or
not.

written by Jokester

Doctor: Your system needs freshening up a bit. I
suggest you take a cold
bath every morning.

Patient: Oh,
but I do, doctor.

Doctor: You do?

Patient: Yes, every
morning I take a nice cold bath and fill it with
nice hot water!

written by Jokester

Doctor: The best time to take a bath is before

retiring.
Patient: You mean I don’t need another bath until I’m

sixty-five?

written by Jokester

Why did the bank robber take a bath?
So he
could make a clean getaway.

written by Jokester

Adam: How did Mummy know you
hadn’t had a
bath?
Eve: I forgot to dirty the towel, wet the soap and flood the

bathroom.

written by Jokester

Nick: Can you tell me the way to Bath? Rick: I
use
soap and water, personally.

written by Jokester

Are you going to take a bath?
No, I’m
leaving it where it is.

written by Jokester

My mother says I look just like an
animal
when I’m in the bath - a little bear.

written by Jokester

Mum, does God use the
bathroom?
No, what
a funny question!
Then why did Dad say this morning, ‘Oh, God, are
you still in
there?’

written by Jokester

Two small time thieves had been sent by the Big
Boss to steal a van
load of goods from a bathroom suppliers. One
stayed in the van as look
out and the other went into the storeroom.
Fifteen minutes went by,
then half an hour, then an hour, and no
sign of him. The look out finally
grew impatient and went to look for
his partner. Inside the store the
two came face to face. “Where
have you been?” demanded the worried
look out. “The boss told me to
take a bath, but I couldn’t find the soap
and a towel.”

written by Jokester

What’s the difference between a peeping Tom and

someone who’s just got out of the bath?
One is rude and nosey.
The other is nude and rosey!

written by Jokester

Stan: I won 92
goldfish.
Fred: Where are
you going to keep them ?
Stan: In the bathroom
Fred: But what will
you do when you want to take a bath ?
Stan: Blindfold them !

written by Jokester

May: What position does your brother play in

the school football team ?
Jay: I think he’s one of the drawbacks
!

written by Jokester

Ned: Boy! Was I ever in hot
water last night
!
Ed: You were? What did you do ?
Ned: I took a bath !

written by Jokester

A man walked into a lodge in Yellowstone

National Park. ‘Can you give me a room and bath?’ he asked the
clerk.
‘I can give you a room,’ the clerk said. ‘But you’ll have to take

the bath by yourself!’

written by Jokester

What kind of bath can you take without
water?
A sun bath.

written by Jokester

When a dirty kid has finished taking a bath, what
is
still dirty?
The bathtub.

written by Jokester

Where does a vampire take a bath?
In the
bat-room (bathroom).

written by Jokester

What criminal doesn’t take baths?
A dirty
crook.

written by Jokester

How do vampire football players get the mud off?

They all get in the bat-tub.

written by Jokester

Which villains steal soap from the bath?
Robber
ducks.

written by Jokester

Boy: Dad, dad, there’s a spider in the bath.

Dad: What’s wrong with that? You’ve seen spiders before.
Boy: Yes,
but this one is three feet wide and using all the hot
water!

written by Jokester

Doctor: And did you drink your medicine after your
bath, Mrs Soap?
Mrs Soap: No, doctor. By the time I’d drunk the
bath there wasn’t
room for medicine.

written by Jokester

The plumber was working in a house when the lady of

the house said to him, “Will it be alright if I have a bath while

you’re having your lunch?”
“It’s okay with me lady,” said the
plumber, “as long as you don’t
splash my sandwiches.”

written by Jokester