Feb 14
When a baby is learning to eat,
shouldn’t he
have an L-plate?
Feb 14
Why did the baby monster put his father
in
the freezer?
Because he wanted frozen pop.
Feb 14
Mum, is it true my baby sister came
from
Heaven?
Yes, that’s right.
Well, I don’t blame God for chucking
her out.
Feb 14
Three men were discussing at a bar about
coincidences. The first man said, ” my wife was reading a “tale of two
cities” and she gave birth to twins”
“That’s funny”, the second man
remarked, “my wife was reading ‘the
three musketeers’ and she
gave birth to triplets”
The third man shouted, “Good God, I have to
rush home!”
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, ” When I
left the
house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty
Thieves”!!!
Feb 14
What did
the Pharaohs use to keep their
babies quiet?
Egyptian dummies.
Feb 14
Mother: Why is there a strange baby in the
crib?
Daughter: You told me to change the baby.
Feb 14
Q: How many baby sitters
does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: None, They don’t make Pampers small enough.
Feb 14
Dewey and Odell met
on the Brownsville main
street. “Say,” said Dewey, “Ah hurd yew and
yore wife is goin’ ta
night school ta take Spanish lessons. How cum?”
“Uh huh,” answered
Odell. “We went and adopted us a little Mexican
baby, and we wanna
be able ta understand him when he gets old enough ta
talk!”
Feb 14
A baby polar bear goes up to his dad and asks,
“Dad, am I pure polar bear?” The dad replies, “Sure you are son. I’m
all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear, your mom is all
polar
bear, and her parents are all polar bear.”
Still unsure the
baby polar bear goes to his mom and asks, “Mom, am I
pure polar
bear?” She answers, “Of course you are honey. I’m all
polar bear, your
father is all polar bear, my parents are all polar bear,
and his
parents are all polar bear.”
Still not convinced the baby polar
bear goes to his grandparents and
asks, “Grandmom…Grandpop…am I
all polar bear?” His grandmother
answers, “Of course you are
sweetie. We’re all polar bear, your mother is
all polar bear, your
father is all polar bear, and his parents are all
polar bear. Why do you
ask sweetie?”
The baby polar bears replies, “Because I’m
f****** freezing!”
Feb 14
Q:
Where does a white baby go when it dies?
A: Heaven
Q: What does it get?
A: Wings
Q:
What does it become?
A: An angel
Q: Where does a
black baby go when it dies?
A: Heaven
Q: What does it get?
A: Wings
Q: What does it become?
A: A Bat!