Feb 14
Q: What’s brown and in a baby’s diaper?
A:
Michael Jackson’s hand !!
Feb 14
Q: What’s pink and red and can’t turn
round
in a corridor?
A: A baby with a javellin through its head.
Feb 14
A family of ducks were
walking down the road
when an 18-wheeler ran over all but 1 baby. Farther
down the road a
family of skunks were walking the other way when the
same
18-wheeler ran over all but one baby. The duck and the skunk finally
met
each other and the duck said, “Excuse me, my mom died down the
road.
Would you tell me what I am?” “Well”, said the skunk “You have
webbed feet, a beak, and feathers. You must be a duck.” “Thanks” said
the duck; then the skunk said, “My mom died down the road too, will
you tell me what I am?” “Well”, said the duck, “Your black, your
white, & your mom’s dead, you must be O.J.’s kid”
Feb 14
Little Johnny ’s next door neighbors had a baby.
Unfortunately, the little baby was born with no ears.
When
they arrived home from the hospital, the parents invited Little
Johnny’s family to come over and see their new baby. Little Johnny’s
parents were very afraid that their son would have a wise crack to say
about the baby so the dad had a long talk with little Johnny before
going
to the neighbors.
He said “Now, son… that poor baby
was born without any ears. I want
you to be on your best behavior
and not say one word about his ears or
I am really going to spank
you when we get back home.”
“I promise not to mention his ears at
all” said Little Johnny.
At the neighbors home, Little Johnny
leaned over in the crib and
touched the baby’s hand He looked at
it’s mother and said “Oh What a
Beautiful little baby”. The mother
said “Thank you very much, Little
Johnny.”
He then
said, “this baby has perfect little hands and perfect little
feet.
Why… just look at his pretty little eyes…. Did his doctor say
that he can see good?”
The Mother said “why, yes Johnny… his
doctor said he has 20/20
vision.
Little Johnny said “well,
its a darn good thing, cause he sure
couldn’t wear glasses!!!
Feb 14
Why do we dress baby girls in pink and baby boys
in blue?
Because they can’t dress themselves.
Feb 14
I got a letter from my sister.
She just had a
baby. But she didn’t say whether it’s a boy or girl.
So I don’t
know if I’m an uncle or an aunt.
Feb 14
Why does a mother carry
her baby?
The baby
can’t carry the mother.
Feb 14
What do you get if you cross a mountain and a
baby
?
A cry for Alp !
Feb 14
What do you get if you cross a baby with soldiers
?
Infantry !