Apr 01
What “bus” crossed
the ocean?
Columbus.
Apr 01
What do you call a man with a double decker bus on
his head
?
The deceased !
Apr 01
Cross-Eyed Monster: When I grow up I want to be a
bus driver.
Witch: Well, I won’t stand in your way.
Apr 01
Q: What is a bus ?
A: A bus is a vehicle that
runs twice as fast when you are after it as
when you are in it.
Apr 01
Why didn’t anyone take the school bus to
school?
I wouldn’t fit through the door.
Mar 31
Why couldn’t
the skeleton pay his bus fare?
Because he was skint.
Mar 31
Roger was sitting in a very full bus when a fat
woman opposite said, “If you were a gentleman, young man, you’d
stand
up and let someone else sit down.” “And if you were a lady,”
replied
Roger, “you’d stand up and let four people sit down.”
Mar 31
What’s the
difference between a bus driver
and a cold?
A bus driver knows the stops, and a cold stops the
nose.
Mar 31
A man standing at a bus stop was eating a
hamburger. Next to him stood a lady with her little dog, which became very
excited at the smell of the man’s supper and began whining and
jumping up
at him. “Do you mind if I throw him a bit?” said the man to
the lady.
“Not at all,” she replied, whereupon the man picked the
dog up and
threw it over a wall.
Mar 31
Teacher: Tommy Russell, you’re late again.
Tommy: Sorry, sir. It’s my bus - it’s always coming late.
Teacher:
Well, if it’s late again tomorrow, catch an earlier
one.