Mar 31
How can you kill an idiot with half a dollar?
Throw it under a bus.
Mar 31
Passenger: Will this bus take me to New York?
Driver: Which part?
Passenger: All of me, of course!
Mar 31
As the bus came to the stop, the man
at the
front of the queue took out his eye, threw it up in the air and
caught it before getting on the bus. An amazed conductor said, ‘What
on
earth did you do that for?’ ‘I wanted to know if there was room on
top,’ replied the man.
Mar 31
When you go for a bus ride, do you like sitting
upstairs or downstairs?
I prefer to ride on top, but it’s very
hard getting the horse up the
stairs.
Mar 31
A man trying to get on an overcrowded bus was
pushed off by
the people inside. There’s no room,’ they said. ‘It’s
full up!’
‘But you must let me on!’ shouted the man.
‘Why,
what’s so special about you?’ they asked.
I’m the driver,’
replied the man.
Mar 31
Passenger: Does this bus go to London?
Conductor: No.
Passenger: But it says London on the front. Conductor:
There’s an
advertisement for baked beans on the side, but we don’t
sell them!
Mar 31
Sam left work after a tiring day. ‘Take the bus
home,’ suggested a friend. ‘My mother would only make me take it
back,’ Sam said.
Mar 31
Did you say that you fell over fifty feet but
didn’t
hurt yourself?
Yes - I was trying to get to the back of the
bus.