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The big game hunter was showing his friends
his
hunting trophies. Drawing their attention to a lion skin rug on
the
floor he said, “I shot this fellow in Africa. Didn’t want to
kill such a
magnificent beast, of course, but it was either him or
me.” “Well,”
said a guest, “he certainly makes a much better rug than
you
would!”

written by Jokester

What’s a big game hunter?
Someone who’s
lost his way to the match.

written by Jokester

Two Virginia boys, Sonny
and Rick, went
out hunting and split up. Sonny heard some rustling in the
bushes
and, by mistake, shot his friend.

After trying to remove the
bullet, he carried Rick to a doctor.

Two hours later, after the
physician had patched up the wounded hunter,
Sonny asked, “Please, Doc.
How’s my friend?”

“Well,” answered the M.D., “he’d be a lot
better off if you hadn’t
taken out his gut!”

written by Jokester

A Cowboy was going deer hunting.. His blonde

wife said she was going with him.. That they never did anything

together.. So, they went.. He put her in a stand by herself.. Later in
the
morning he heard her shoot.. He went over to her stand and she
was pointing
her rifle at a guy with a cowboy hat on.. The guy was
telling her,
Ma’mm, you can have the deer you shot.. I just want
to take my saddle off
of him!

written by Jokester

An avid duck hunter was in the market for a
new bird dog. His
search ended when he found a dog that could
actually walk on water to
retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was
sure none of his friends
would ever believe him. He decided to try to
break the news to a friend
of his, the eternal pessimist who
refused to be impressed with anything.
This, surely, would impress him.
He invited him to hunt with him and
his new dog. As they waited by
the shore, a flock of ducks flew by. they
fired, and a duck fell.
The dog responded and jumped into the water.
The dog, however, did
not sink but instead walked across the water to
retrieve the bird,
never getting more than his paws wet. This continued
all day long;
each time a duck fell, the dog walked across the surface of
the water
to retrieve it. The pessimist watched carefully, saw
everything,
but did not say a single word. On the drive home the hunter asked

his friend, “Did you notice anything unusual about my new dog?” “I

sure did,” responded the pessimist. “He can’t swim.”

written by Jokester

A group of
hunters fully equipped with
rifles, ammo and camping supplies, came upon a
young boy armed only
with a slingshot. “What are you hunting for?”
asked an older hunter.
“I don’t know. I ain’t seen it yet,” said the
boy.

written by Jokester

A big-game hunter came across a dinosaur in
the middle of the
jungle and stared at it surprise.”You’re extinct,”
he said. The
dinosaur was hard of hearing.”What was that you said?”
The hunter shouted
at the top of his voice.”You are extinct.” The
dinosaur looked a
little nonplused. “So would you if you’d been
dead for six milion
years.”

written by Jokester

What is the best way to hunt bear ?
With
your clothes off.

written by Jokester

Mike and Pat went hunting. Mike saw a large

goose fly by. He raised his rifle to shoot.
‘Don’t waste your
time,’ Pat hollered.
‘The rifle is not loaded.’
‘I can’t
wait,’ Mike shouted back.
‘The bird will be gone if I take the time to
load!’

written by Jokester

Dick and Bob
were on a hunting trip. At
nightfall, Dick complained, ‘We’ve been
hunting all day. We’ve
shot at five deer - and not hit one!’
‘OK. Let’s miss two more and
then head back to camp,’ said
Bob.

written by Jokester